Hooray! You’ve just got engaged! Now what?
There is no other feeling in the world like the feeling that you’ve just got engaged to the person you love most in all the world. You’re on Cloud 9, actually Cloud 999. You feel you might just burst with the joy and the excitement. Here are 10 fun things and one practical thing to do in those first moments and days.
1. THE MOMENT
Savour the moment with each other before rushing to tell your family and friends. It’s a mini version of the wonderful Jewish custom of Yichud, where the newly-weds share a few minutes together right after the ceremony before going to join their guests in a receiving line or other celebration. It’s a way of treasuring and marking that intense moment and the emotions of love and excitement it brings.
2.THE ENGAGEMENT CELEBRATION DATE
Go on a date that very day or night, or as soon as possible to your favourite restaurant, place, event or activity or even have a weekend away just the two of you, to savour being fiancés.
3.TELLING THE FAMILY
Tell your family first – before announcing it to all your friends and all over Social Media. It’s great if you can tell your family in person. But if that’s not feasible, do it over Skype or Facetime so you can see each other. Failing that, a phonecall. Don’t spring it on them with a text or leave them to hear about it through Social Media rather than directly from you.
4.TELLING THE FRIENDS
Then tell your close friends, and then announce it on Social Media, maybe with a ring selfie, or even better, with a photo of the two of you looking ecstatic, with the ring on display as well, of course!
Get a first-rate manicure so that your hands look fabulous, and are the perfect setting for your beautiful ring.
6. ENGAGEMENT PARTY
Have a party to celebrate your engagement. Depending on your style, and the kind of gathering you enjoy most, make it a dinner, a beach party, a barbecue, a meal at a fabulous restaurant, a dance party…
7. WEDDING DATE
The minute you announce your engagement, the first thing every single person will ask you is “When are you getting married?”. Don’t panic if you don’t have an answer. Now is the time to just start thinking about your favourite season of the year, your favourite place. This is the time for dreaming. Nailing down the actual date comes later.
Where would you like to get married? The place where you had your first date? The place where the proposal took place? Your favourite restaurant, a garden, a beach, on a boat, on a mountain? If you could choose anywhere you wanted, where would it be? – don’t be afraid to dream about the place. It’s not yet the time for practicalities!
9. WEDDING GUESTS
Who would you like to have at the wedding? Have a brainstorming session with each other, and then with family and friends. If you’re including others in the brainstorming, make sure you let them know that it is a brainstorming – so all and any ideas can be thrown into the ring, but no decisions are being made at this early stage of the process. This is not the time to accept or reject anything. That way feelings won’t be hurt, and the process will be fun.
What kind of ceremony do you want to have? The ceremony is the very heart of your wedding day. Do you want traditional, religious, totally original, filled with rituals, your own vows, the story of how you met, do you want any special songs or readings to be part of the ceremony? This is the time to let your dreams and imagination run wild.
11. RING INSURANCE
Here comes the practical tip: Make sure your ring is insured against loss, theft or damage. You can either get a specific policy for the ring – you can probably buy this from the jeweller – or add it to your home insurance policy.
So, enjoy every moment of the newly-engaged feeling, do some dreaming and brainstorming, and then you can start getting into the practicalities of setting a budget, choosing the actual venue, setting the real date and getting all the people lined up who will turn your dream wedding into a reality.
Catherine Kentridge, Licensed Wedding Officiant
Custom Wedding Ceremonies